Love yourself. Another great phrase that we hear in these times of change where little by little we realise that since childhood we have been taught many rules and many ways of acting but perhaps that is why we are here and we don’t know how to do it, to love ourselves.
But what does that really mean? How can we manage to do that?
In my quest to figure it out I came across different meditation groups, I learned to breathe and stretch, to let go of my body and let go of my mind, but always, after doing all this, I kept asking myself “how do I love myself?”
Eventually the answer came in something simpler than I imagined, but deeper than the very words that describe it.
I discovered that to love myself is first of all to be in my truth, to be able to accept what I feel and above all not to deceive myself, to go through every emotion that causes me pain as well as through those that cause me love and well-being.
Not wanting to run away when anger, betrayal, pain, sadness, hatred, etc. arrive. Not rushing to seek relief in activities that distract me and give me the impression of avoiding or ‘dumping’ the emotions that cause me uncertainty and pain.
Let’s understand together how we can love who we really are and how we can recognize our avoidance mechanisms so that we can live our lives fully and express our full potential and love ourselves for who we really are.
-HOW CAN WE LOVE OURSELVES IF WE RUN AWAY FROM WHO WE ARE?
In the society in which we live, there are many stimuli and sometimes we are pushed to lose ourselves in a routine way of life that takes us away from being sensitive to what we really feel.
Between work, family, social media, various distractions and social gatherings, taking time to let ourselves feel what we are experiencing can sometimes seem like a luxury. But in reality, everything we do in life is a choice, whether we want to see it or not. Choosing to be with what we feel and giving space to certain emotions, whether they
are pleasant or not, is part of the path to truly knowing ourselves, loving ourselves for all that we are.
Especially in this ‘new reality’ that we have never experienced before, moments of fear, anger and tension may arise more often than before. It is up to us to choose whether to run away or try to block out what we feel, or to give
space to certain emotions in order to understand them and ourselves. Also because running away from ourselves does not help much and only makes us lose time in our life path.
That emotion, that fear, that feeling of emptiness, if we try to drown it in our daily activities, will not disappear, but will reappear later with greater force. It’s like a boiling pot, if we plug it up with force the water will come out and flood the cooker and probably put out the fire, if we let the steam out, stirring the contents of the pot the result will certainly be better.
But pots aside, how do we cope with these emotions that move within us without getting lost, and above all, how can we understand and ‘see’ them?
-THE SEXUAL CHAKRA, THE CONTAINER FOR BLOCKED EMOTIONS
In this chapter we enter a field that may not be familiar to everyone but which I want to address in the simplest way. I want to talk to you about the sexual chakra or sacral chakra, but for those who have resistance to certain so-called “spiritual” concepts, think of it simply as that part of your lower abdomen where you can feel emotions or tensions and where, above all, you feel a feeling of apparent lightness after certain sexual relations.
This point of the body is where many of the emotions we experience throughout our lives accumulate, this is also where memories of unpleasant or unpleasant situations experienced in childhood or other more recent moments of life are energetically stored.
And it is precisely to this energetic point that one of the escape mechanisms we often use unconsciously, sexuality, is linked. Over the centuries, human beings have often used sexuality as a way to ‘discharge’
certain emotions. But like any other emotional escape mechanism, it has served us very little purpose. After an immediate sense of lightness, the feeling of certain types of emotions comes back stronger than before.
This happens because emotions that come from experienced traumas, in order to be processed, must be seen, understood.
In short, one must become aware of how they were formed and what it is important to do to be able to integrate them and not have to be subjected to them.
-EMOTION IS NOT WHO I AM BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND AND LOVE MYSELF BY LOOKING THROUGH IT.
So many times I have heard people believe that they are their own emotions. I don’t believe this is true but I do believe in understanding who we are by looking into our emotions.
I know that logic may be puzzled by this statement but at the same time I know that it is possible and that, for me, it is one of the most direct ways to heal the sense of inadequacy and pain that certain emotions can bring and make us free to act and realise our projects.
And when I talk about emotional freedom, I am not only talking about inner wellbeing but also about physical wellbeing, because our emotions not only affect our moods and the implementation of our plans, but if left inside we can become like rotten apples and lead to physical discomfort.
In my work I combine coaching with energy work and connecting with our subconscious. I help people to connect and look into their heart chakra, which is the centre of who we are, and into the sacral chakra where the blocked emotions of lived experiences are located.
With this technique people are able to get to the root causes of certain emotional blocks, see where they come from and are able, through coaching applied to this technique, to make profound changes in their lives.
The thing that continues to make me believe in this non-methodical method called Sa’Sen Yin is that it works even, and sometimes even more, in people who have no knowledge of the spiritual world.
These people are able to get in touch with their subconscious without the barriers of certain acquired notions and see and understand themselves deeply. I still remember a client who came to me because of a strong discomfort he felt after a break-up.
This person did not even know what he was going to do, only that I could help him. In a very short time he was able to connect with the emotion that was blocking him and see what was behind it.
The change in his life was so great that he met another partner with whom he could grow and share after only a month of working together, understanding what the shortcomings were in the previous relationship and how to overcome them. And we were in the middle of quarantine. When you look inside, results always come.
-LOVE YOURSELF IN ORDER TO LOVE
After years of experience and observation of my own life as well as the life of the human being in general, I have understood that in order to love not only another person, but to love life in all its forms, it is essential to love oneself first.
This is why I believe that the first goal we must want to achieve, to which the success of the rest of our lives is probably linked, is to truly love ourselves.
Nowadays there are many techniques for doing this and everyone has to understand what is best for them to achieve this goal.
But the fundamental thing to understand in which direction to start moving is to really ask ourselves if we are following a path based on truth, if we are not deceiving ourselves.
To love oneself is to look inside oneself with courage, but above all it is to want to finally be at peace and in harmony with ourselves, accepting and integrating all that we carry inside.